I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize