she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
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