she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
