But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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