As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
