I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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