Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize