I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
