so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
