I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
as a side note pls kill me
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
