btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
