in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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