I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize