just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
