i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
