I think my vagina is haunted
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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