Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
