seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
