omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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