i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize