the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
