We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
