well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
