Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize