I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
