Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
