I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
