and you said cock pushups were impossible
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize
