I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
