just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
