Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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