If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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