wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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