but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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