Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I would ride that face into the sunset
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
