Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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