You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
