Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
