yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
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