my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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