i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
