All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
