I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
