Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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