Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize