Hey man sorry I got all grabby
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
