talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize