Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
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