We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
