Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Two words: blizzard sex
She has the best kind of daddy issues
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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