No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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