he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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