That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
